26. August 2009 by Starr.

Some places are rarely noticed, in the scheme of day to day busy life…until one becomes desperate enough to actually need such a place, and within there lies the noticing.  A bar, or pool hall or pawn shop, may represent a background prop to one, and yet it may represent life’s blood to another.  A character I named Truman, understands this happenstance and he has a story to tell.

On a dirty Chicago street, not far from the, now toxic, Lake Michigan, Truman stumbles into a little place called, “Trixie’s Timepieces.”

Below, an exerpt from “Tricking Time”–my latest sci fi short story, now in progress.

“Some places are seen only by the most desperate of people, depending on what they are…desperate for.  Which, becomes quite frustrating, during the happier months of the year.  Customers just seem to, drop off, then,” Trixie said, while caressing her chunky thumb across a large-faced watch, fastened with a tiny lock, around her right wrist.

I nibbled a thumbnail, wondering if I would have been better off buying a train ticket than trusting Trixie.  I turned my gaze to the clang of the garbage truck trundling by, outside of the grungy store window.  I had read the sign on Trixie’s window a thousand times, but today, it held new meaning.  They were backwards to me now, looking from the inside out.  Usually, I was on the outside looking in, as the words, “Trixie’s Timepieces- Buy Yourself Some Time” arched over my head in colorful letters.

I bit into my bottom lip and slammed the timepiece into my jeans pocket.  I had to do it.  Had to.

The stench of the city seemed to encircle me as I stepped outside.  I had to find green grass and fresh air.  No matter the cost.

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25. August 2009 by Starr.

I’ve realized the importance of solitude.  I’m not sure where it started, but I can think back to times in high school, when I preferred being “out and about” when most people didn’t.  I honestly liked to choose my timing when I was required to be “sociable.”  And that’s just how it felt, like a “requirement.”  Lately, I’ve been putting some thought into this mindset of mine, as I’ve seen some changes occur over the last year or so, and I’m venturing out here on a limb to say, that I think, yes…indeed I think, that I’m somewhat of a hermit.

While I was in the bubble bath contemplating that fact, I started to think and wonder, what exactly IS a hermit, anyway?  I had in my mind it was a reclusive person, possibly an old woman with a torn straw hat with about thirty cats who talked to herself while organizing her sock drawer obsessively, and that certainly isn’t me.  I don’t even own a pet, anyway.  But…I had to ask myself…what does this mean, on a deeper level, about me?

Here is some information I found online about the hermit thing:

• Hermits choose to live and spend most of their time apart from other people.
• Hermits have a constant awareness of dimensions of human life besides the material.
• Hermits live simply, so as to be free to interact deeply with these dimensions.
• Hermits are committed to living in a way that expresses their convictions in practical terms in everyday life.
• Hermits have a deep conviction of the usefulness and power of silent contemplation.
• Hermits use such insights as they receive for the benefit of those who seek them out for counsel; but do not necessarily actively promote them, or evangelise.
• Hermits have to maintain themselves in some way compatible with their eremitical profession. Craft work, research, writing, counselling are ways in which some hermits generate financial support.
• The hermit does not isolate him/herself from the genuine needs of neighbours, or the local community, whether practical or social. Indeed, the social conscience needs constant fine-tuning, or the solitary state can easily become a personal indulgence.
• There is a strong eremitical tradition of offering hospitality to the traveller, and especially to the pilgrim. In the past some hermits discouraged casual callers simply by living in distant and inaccessible, sometimes inhospitable, places. Such a course is more difficult to accomplish these days, especially when hermits are obliged, or choose, to live in an urban setting.
• The maintenance of balance is important in the eremitical life. Orthodox religions have spiritual directors, whose task is to assist hermits and religious to evaluate themselves honestly, and not to escape into self-delusion or fantasy. Physical activity, healthy diet, suitable clothing and accomodation, good study habits, a sense of humour, and emotional stability are essential.

This is a new concept for me, thinking of myself as a “hermit.”  But, when reading the above thoughts, I can definitely see it.  I don’t see it as a bad thing, either…for it’s not like I live in the mountains with only racoons and squirrels to talk to.  I just have a very busy life, being a mother of four, a writer, a conference speaker and all of the titles that comes along with those.  I value my time alone (meaning, at home…which is very seldom alone) and I value my time to play, and I sometimes just feel that being out in the “world” just messes with the muse.  So, I’m not going to question it, I’m just going to go with it.

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20. August 2009 by Starr.

 So, today is a rainy, dreary day in Missouri…perfect for the muse to ignite.  I love how specific things can start a muse fire….and I love it when I can just let it burn without holding back.

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12. August 2009 by Starr.

 Lately, I’ve been kind of in a funk.  One of those types of funks where I don’t really wanna leave the house and be around people…but just want to write, think…make notes…think some more…soak in the bubble bath and wonder how I’m going to synchronize the fight scene in chapter 10….to name just a few.    Now that I’ve felt like I have the “green light” to just play….things have kind of happened a little crazy in my life and I’ve been tossed a bit off course.  I haven’t even blogged in the last week….until now.

 I read an article today that said that sunlight helps depression moods.  (Not that I’m in a depression, but…funk may be a form of that, don’t ya think?)  Anyway…it was saying how being in the sunlight directly effects our moods and our  physical body in a positive fashion, and that they see a higher rate of depression in states that have rainier climates and longer winters.  That felt completely backward to me.

I have noticed about myself, the following fact:  I am much more energized, happy, stable, creative and passionate about life in colder, darker, rainer, cloudier climates.  It is honestly like the sunnier it is….the more it annoys me…distracts me.  I wear shades any time I go outside, even to the mailbox….and would wear them 24/7  if my kids wouldn’t accuse me of being odd.  (They already think I’m almost a hermit.)

So…that made me think that the peeps who tested those people in those climates…maybe their clinical studies were biased.  Certainly, I can’t be the only one is happier during autumn, winter, and thunderstorms….so…this week, thunderstorms and rain clouds happened…two days in a row…and that helped break through my funky block….

and yes….along with a friend standing up for what is right against a difficult situation….a great appointment with my hairdresser who truly works magic…and spending some time with my family tonight over french fries and milkshakes….basically….long blog short…….i’m back.

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